“31 Five-Second Reminders that Will Make Calmness Your Superpower”

This blog post, from Marc & Angel’s “Hack Life,” is a list of 31 five-second reminders that will make “calmness your superpower.”  Here’s a short excerpt from the intro:

“The ultimate measure of your wisdom and strength?  How calm you are when facing any given situation.  Yes, calmness is a human superpower.  The ability to not overreact or take things personally keeps your thoughts clean and your heart at peace, which instantly gives you an upper hand regardless of your circumstances.  Thus, the biggest and most complex obstacle you will ever have to overcome is your own mind.  If you can overcome that, you can overcome almost anything.  And by ‘overcoming,’ I’m referring to the skill of mindfulness, and learning to effectively control your emotional responses to life’s unexpected tests.  Because most of your deepest pain and frustration on a daily basis will come from the way you respond, not the way life is.”

And here’s one of the five-second reminders:

“When you are lost in worry, it is easy to mistake your worries for reality, instead of recognizing that they are just thoughts.”

Check out the full list of reminders here:

www.marcandangel.com/2018/04/08/31-five-second-reminders-that-will-make-calmness-your-superpower/

Robin

 

Hiring a geriatric care manager – why and how

Though this article is titled “when to hire a geriatric care manager for your parent,” this article applies to all types of people who would hire geriatric care managers, not just adult children. This is a good article that covers these topics:

* how a geriatric care manager can help
* how much does a geriatric care manager cost
* how to hire a geriatric care manager
* questions to ask a geriatric care manager
* how to get started

For those in the Menlo Park area, this Wednesday there will be an excellent geriatric care manager speaking at the Parkinson’s support group meeting from 2 to 3:30pm at Little House. No RSVP is required. Come check out how she answers these questions.

Here’s a link to the full article:

www.nextavenue.org/hire-geriatric-care-manager-parent/

When to Hire a Geriatric Care Manager for Your Parent
Getting answers to questions and having an advocate can be valuable
By Sarah Stasik
From Caring.com
April 6, 2018

Robin

 

One woman’s candid story about caregiving for an aging parent

This is a sweet but sad article about a woman caring for her mother. The woman describes the “guilt” in caring for an aging parent. The guilt comes from feeling that respites are too short and not missing a parent while away on the respite.

Here’s a meaningful excerpt: “People who have cared for loved ones told me it takes time to miss the healthy, vital person who dies, the person you enjoyed talking to and doing things with, not the needy or sometimes unknowing imposter. You don’t miss being a caretaker, you miss being a friend, wife or daughter.”

Here’s a link to the article:

www.nextavenue.org/miss-mother-gone/

I Didn’t Miss My Mother — Until She Was Gone
One woman’s candid story about caregiving for an aging parent
By Lisa Kosan
April 3, 2018
Next Avenue

 

Robin

 

Compassion fatigue in caregiving and ways to take care of yourself

Though this article has “dementia caregiving” in the title, the issue of “compassion fatigue” applies to all caregivers.  In caregiving, the “demands are many” and there is not enough time to get everything done.  Any many times the person receiving care resents being helped or may not express appreciation.

The author believes caregivers can overcome compassion fatigue by caring for themselves.  She suggests several ways to care for yourself:

* don’t take outbursts personally
* be kind to yourself
* share your feelings
* talk to someone
* find support
* validate your feelings
* grieve
* have fun

This is a blog post on the Huffington Post Canada website so some of the words having British English spellings.

Find the post here:

www.huffingtonpost.ca/gail-elliot/compassion-fatigue-caregiving_a_23389637/

Compassion Fatigue Is A Reality Of Dementia Caregiving
If you are connected to the world of dementia care, the demands are many. In your quest to help others, are you taking time to care for yourself?
by Gail Elliot
HuffPost
03/20/2018 

Robin

 

“The Happy Hours” – great idea for socialization and other thoughts from KLS

Kathryn Leigh Scott (kathrynleighscott.com) has recently published three books about caregiving —
“The Happy Hours”
“A Welcome Respite”
“Now With You, Now Without”

In January 2018, I shared Denise’s short review of “A Welcome Respite.”

In 2016, Kathryn Leigh Scott (KLS) published the beautiful book “Last Dance at the Savoy,” about caring for the love of your life through the very end. KLS mentions Brain Support Network for help with brain donation in this book. Denise’s short review of that book is posted to our blog, www.brainsupportnetwork.org/blog.

After listening to a February 2018 interview* of Kathryn Leigh Scott, I think “The Happy Hours” might be of interest to some of you. I haven’t read it yet but, in the interview, Kathryn shares the core idea of the book. In her husband Geoff’s final years — after he was diagnosed with progressive supranuclear palsy (PSP) — she was determined to make the most of his remaining time. And she was determined that neither Geoff nor she, as the caregiver, would be isolated.

KLS and Geoff instituted “happy hour” at their home. The happy hour took place in the master bedroom. She removed all signs of medical equipment or disability. She added a bistro table and chairs. There was an open door policy. Anyone could come. Geoff wore an amplification device so that his voice could be heard. Apparently these gatherings were very important to her husband as they helped him be remembered by others.

In the interview, she mentions a few other things worth sharing here. First, she says that the key is to have patience. She tried to remember that “Geoff can’t help it.”

Second, she found the role reversal of caregiving very difficult.

Third, she addressed the importance to her husband Geoff of his engaging in research. He participated in trials. And he donated his brain for research. They both participated in an environmental study of PSP.

Fourth, she recommends hospice at home. She doesn’t call hospice “end of life care” but rather “quality of life care.”

A few things were said about PSP in the interview. I’ve put some notes about that below for the PSP folks on this email list.

Robin

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* https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=j4hzl7SYseA&feature=youtu.be

The caregiver-related part of the interview is basically from minute 6 to minute 22.

From minute 6 to minute 10:27, Kathryn Leigh Scott offers some general information on PSP. She describes PSP as being part of a family of five progressive movement disorders. The five are PSP, corticobasal degeneration, multiple system atrophy, Lewy body dementia, and ALS. The host of the interview incorrectly refers to these as auto-immune disorders. KLS said that 20K people a year are diagnosed with PSP in the US. PSP research is informing Alzheimer’s research.