Monthly Archives: July 2017

“A Navy SEAL explains 8 secrets to grit and resilience”

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Several of you know that I’m interested in the topic of resilience — how we can build our resilience to weather the storms of neurological decline. A caregiver in Brain Support Network’s group sent me this recent article (from a career advice website) on a Navy SEAL explaining the eight secrets to grit and resilience. Perhaps you will find some useful information here, whether you are a caregiving, person with a neurological disorder, or otherwise challenged by something in your life.

The eight secrets from the article are:

1- Purpose and meaning. It’s easier to be persistent when what we’re doing is tied to something personally meaningful.

2- Make it a game. It’s the best way to stay in a competitive mindset without stressing yourself out.

3- Be confident — but realistic. See the challenges honestly but believe in your own ability to take them on.

4- Prepare, prepare, prepare. Grit comes a lot easier when you’ve done the work to make sure you’re ready.

5- Focus on improvement. Every SEAL mission ends with a debrief focusing on what went wrong so they can improve.

6- Give help and get help. Support from others helps keep you going, and giving others support does the same.

7- Celebrate small wins. You can’t wait to catch the big fish. Take joy where you can find it when good times are scarce.

8- Find a way to laugh. Rangers, SEALs, and scientists agree: a chuckle can help you cope with stress and keep you going.

Here’s a link to the full article: (Note that there are a lot of ads on the website.)

www.theladders.com/career-advice/navy-seal-grit-resilience

Success
A Navy SEAL explains 8 secrets to grit and resilience
By Eric Barker
Jun 7, 2017
TheLadders.com

Let me know if this resonates with anyone coping with a neurological disorder.

Robin

 

“How Caregiving Changes Us – What Dies, What Grows”

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Donna Thomson is a caregiver for her son (with disabilities) and for her mother.  She writes a blog called “The Caregivers’ Living Room.”  I thought this short post from February 2017 on how caregiving has changed her was worth sharing.  She explains what has died in her, and what has grown in her.

Robin

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www.donnathomson.com/2017/02/how-caregiving-changes-us-what-dies.html

How Caregiving Changes Us – What Dies, What Grows
Sunday, 5 February 2017
The Caregivers’ Living Room – A Blog by Donna Thomson

Lately I’ve been thinking a lot about how we change over time as caregivers – the parts of ourselves that die and the new parts that grow.

What has died in me:
– An assumption that I will have spontaneity in my life
– The idea that life would carry on according to my plans
– The inability to be alone
– Insecurity in my own abilities to do what I put my mind to
– Fear of vulnerability

What has grown in me:
– The sense of being happy without other people to ‘make’ me happy
– Humility in the face of the random nature of what life deals me
– Confidence in my values and in my advocacy skills
– Acceptance of my own limitations in keeping my loved ones healthy and safe
– A growing awareness of my own mortality

What has died in you? What has grown?

Five steps for shared caregiving (The Caregiver Space)

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Five steps for shared caregiving (The Caregiver Space)

This post may be of interest to adult children caregivers.

This post on The Caregiver Space (thecaregiverspace.org) is about the fact that “siblings respond to their aging parents differently” and this can cause problems such as siblings who refuse to help or siblings who forcefully take control. Unfortunately, childhood “squabbles can reemerge when it comes time for eldercare.”

I thought this statement was interesting: “One mother can take care of seven children, but seven children can’t care for one mother.”

The author cites a caregiving expert for three ways to “deal with siblings who refuse to take on their fare share of responsibilities”:

* “Ask for help. Be direct and tell them exactly what you need or what they might do to ease your burden.”

* “Have a care plan. A care plan can help you organize tasks and responsibilities to make it easier for them to get involved.”

* “Let go of expectations. By learning to let go of your expectations and hurt and allowing yourself the liberty to find help elsewhere without feelings of resentment, you are ensuring your own peace of mind.”

The author provides her “Top 5 Tips for Shared Caregiving,” where everyone keeps the following in mind:

* “People make mistakes – and sometimes what you believe is a mistake may actually not be a mistake at all.”

* “Two opposite opinions can both be right.”

* “Appreciate what they’re doing instead of thinking about how you could do it better.”

* “You all share love for your parent and the fact that you have different opinions is okay.”

* “Always support each other and respect each other’s opinions.”

Here’s a link to the full blog post:

thecaregiverspace.org/sharing-caregiving-tasks-with-your-siblings/

Sharing caregiving tasks with your siblings
by Hanna Landman (Guest Author)
Jul 1, 2017
The Caregiver Space

Robin

 

“How to Build Your Own Geriatric Team” (WSJ)

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This blog post to the Wall Street Journal (wsj.com) was written by Marc Agronin, MD, a geriatric psychiatrist. He is the author of “How We Age: A Doctor’s Journey into the Heart of Growing Old.”

In this article, Dr. Agronin says there are not enough geriatricians for our aging population now and there are not going to be enough in the future. He suggests a few ways to find a geriatrician. But, failing that, Dr. Agronin makes four suggestions to “help your own doctors to be more like geriatric specialists”:

1. Select a doctor with some geriatric training and an interest in seeing older patients in your age range.

2. Carry a document that has all your important medical information, especially an updated list of your major medical and psychiatric issues and current medications (prescribed, over-the-counter, and supplements).

3. “Prepare a list of questions ahead of each doctor visit and don’t leave until you have answers that you understand and agree with. For any proposed tests or procedures, ask about potential risks, what the results will show, and how this information will change the management of the illness. If you have even mild memory problems, always bring along somebody to help ask questions and record answers.”

4. Prepare advance directives designating your surrogate decision maker for medical care if you are incapacitated. Give your doctors a copy of these advance directives.

Here’s a link to the blog post:

blogs.wsj.com/experts/2015/10/20/how-to-build-your-own-geriatric-team/

How to Build Your Own Geriatric Team
Wall Street Journal
October 20, 2015
By Marc Agronin

Robin